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Gorgeous Woman Has Absolutely No Charisma Due to Unique Scar

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Revision as of 19:36, 9 March 2026 by EdensFall (talk | contribs) (Created page with "=== Gorgeous Woman Has Absolutely No Charisma Due to Unique Scar === A drowess of a noble house agreed, "Yeah, she would be a 10 if it wasn't for that strikingly unique scar on her wrist. But no self respecting person could look at that scar and ever want to have anything to do with her again." Even the goblin messenger took a wide breath around the scantily clad and gorgeous woman. In other news, Yivik complains about a zombie not following proper etiquette. The Mushro...")
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Gorgeous Woman Has Absolutely No Charisma Due to Unique Scar

A drowess of a noble house agreed, "Yeah, she would be a 10 if it wasn't for that strikingly unique scar on her wrist. But no self respecting person could look at that scar and ever want to have anything to do with her again." Even the goblin messenger took a wide breath around the scantily clad and gorgeous woman. In other news, Yivik complains about a zombie not following proper etiquette.

The Mushroom, Andunor's finest news source, brings you the latest and most up to date information available. Visit THE mushroom just outside the tradepost. Our previous publications are below.

Smith Hammers Cold Coal and Ore into Suspicious Ingot

One bystander said "When asked for an ingot, the Ogre smith simply placed cold coal and ore on an anvil and smashed it together into an ingot. The buyer looked confused but too afraid to complain to a monster who is capable of such a feat."

In other news, Yivik Everhate was recently hired by The Mushroom to clean up the Hub. Because mushrooms have no eyes or ears, we require you, the terrible people of Andunor, to ensure that Yivik does his job. After intense negotiations, The Mushroom has generously agreed to an enhanced pay package for Yivik 's salary of 500,000 coins per day. With such a generous pay package, Yivik has no excuse but to keep the Hub spotless. Everyone, make sure he works hard. Yivik, you will see your salary in your bank account at the end of each day, which by definition occurs after each rise and setting of the sun on the city of Andunor.

Writworkers Leave Signs All Over Hub Instead of Actually Working

People who take jobs, then look for someone else to do the hard work of the job for them, have left papers strewn about the hub in such volume that the tiles are no longer safe to tread and are especially dangerous to disoriented incoming portal users. Such antics have further inspired others to leave more signs for other things, making the trash exponentially worse. A derro was recently spotted sculpting an unholy idol in the west wheel, presumably from the mud-encrusted refuse that peacekeepers are not paid to clean up.

In other news, dozens of the poorest performing shop owners in Andunor accidentally outed themselves after being triggered by a fake news article. Although the shop owners went on strike in protest, this had no effect on the economy because no one bought anything from the shops anyway. Later, it was discovered that 9 out of 10 of the shops were actually owned by Myon operatives trying to ruin Andunor's economy.

Shop Sells First Item in Years, Now Realizes Shop Wasn't Storage

The shop owner said he was looking for somewhere to store his junk, and realized that the shop holds more things than his house, and is even harder to break into, so they had been using the shop for storage for years without realizing someone might actually buy something. "But that's OK," the shop owner said, "because I can raise all the prices to ensure nothing else sells."

Loremaster Tells Her Secret to Anyone Who Will Listen

After spending the better half of her life learning the arcane secrets of our planar existence, including the ability to bend space and time and astral project without requiring any spellcasting ability, the loremaster then decided to give up all of these secrets for free to the entire populace. The vast majority of now obsolete mages, sorcerers, shamans, druids and clerics throughout the realms looked for more useful skills like cooking and cleaning.

       Day 21, Month 11 (Uktar), 188 AR
       ''The Mushroom''