Aramentia's Diary, Vol I-III
Aramentia's Diary, Vol I
I've decided to write a diary, so that my children will have some way of sharing in my life, even though I cannot share these days with them.
My life is in a time of change; the dream that was Meiritin has fled, and now I find myself back at Bendir, which is as empty as I've ever seen it. There are some familiar faces around, but very few... and more worryingly, so few unfamiliar faces. It does not feel alive. Still, I think I know how to find my place here again. I have met a couple called Kikko and Aldur who have been struggling to set up a shrine to Yondalla. I have bought the home next door to where I used to live, and will open it up for use as Yondalla's shrine.
'''
Things are taking shape here. Ritz - who now, de facto, leads Bendir, has met with Kikko and Aldur and appointed them as his officers. I am to advise him. He is older than he was and more responsible, but much of the old Ritz is still there. Familiar surroundings, familiar people... quite comforting.
'''
Aldur and Kikko were attacked by a hin called Madeline, apparently in the company of goblins and kobolds, though the account was quite confused. What would drive a hin to ally with monsters against her own kin? I will find out. If she can be brought around, her friendship could be very valuable. I'm finding myself a bit sidelined here, while the warriors try and run things themselves. I think I would do a better job for Bendir... but I will need allies first.
'''
Met with Madeline today. She was not at all what I expected... opinionated and principled, not pragmatic or seeking redemption. She also let slip that she prefers women, which surprised me. By helping her I should be able to win her trust... and perhaps her loyalty may be swayed the same way as a man.
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Have persuaded Ritz and Aldur to drop things with Madeline, so long as she stays out of Bendir and out of their way. Yondalla's creed is a powerful one, and makes our path clear in this. I have always appreciated how turning to Yondalla's wisdom helps solve any problem.
'''
Madeline was arrested by Cordor today... in her home in the Crow's Nest, a day after she told me of it. I hope she doesn't think I gave her away. Aldur thinks it happened because he told Veneoso that she was wanted by him and Bendir before I persuaded him to drop the matter.
'''
Visited Madeline in jail. She seems to trust me already, and I am sure that if I can get her out she will trust me completely. Aldur has promised to introduce me to Veneoso to plead her case.
'''
Veneoso agreed to let Madeline go, if I signed a contract making my life forfeit should she kill again. He wasn't at all happy to let her go, apparently she's been caught before and released only to kill. The contract gives him a little more confidence, bt only a little. I could have kissed him for suggesting it... it binds Madeline to me more than anything I'd thought of, and I'm confident I can keep her from breaking its terms. Even if she does, well, I think I can get out of trouble. Light Keep don't remember me, it seems, so I could go to them and explain that I was trying to redeem her, and would they help me.
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Aldur is growing tired of Ritz's lack of attention to the fort, and feeling a bit overwhelmed. I have been helpful and supportive, and told him of the old councils and mayors. He is not stupid and will get there eventually.
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Madeline continues to surprise me... what's most surprising is how much I enjoy the time I spend with her. She's wrapped up with Samras which is helpful... it means I'm the friend who's always there, and she's getting used to accepting my advice.
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Aldur said today that he'll call a meeting of all hin on the island to discuss the leadership of Bendir. Good. I think I know what sort of structure to lay down that will allow me to guide the community as it needs to be guided... Yondalla has accepted me as a priestess, and I look forward to building Bendir up as it once was.
'''
The Amnish are looking for me... they questioned Aldur in Cordor, and I think he let something slip. He didn't admit it to me but I saw it in his eyes. I should avoid Cordor, and start thinking about how to divert their attention elsewhere.
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A package arrived from my children... some of their pictures and a doll of me! When I opened it the relief I felt was enormous... I hadn't really realised how much I feared that they'd forget about me. Knowing that they are thinking of me is worth so much... even worth the risk of the Amnish getting closer to finding me.
'''
Bendir is drifting again. I've barely seen the others for many days now; I have seen this pattern before. Now I spend much of my time with Madeline. Today we found an odd silver weight in mysterious circumstances... it's tied in some way to the Arcane Tower. We'll take it there when the wizards have prepared for possible danger.
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We met the first Warden of the Arcane Tower's Asylum today. She was very powerful and very grumpy at having been imprisoned for so long. She offered to let Madeline and I go, for helping her get free... but Madeline wanted to stay and help the wizards against her. I think I made a mistake, but I was afraid for our lives... Madeline was deeply unimpressed by my advice to flee. She wasn't quite ready for that... I rushed things and that may make things harder now.
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Aldur's meeting never happened, and I think Bendir no longer exists as a community... just the traders and the soldiers. Alone, I'm not in any position to change that... I need allies. All those I've spoken to don't really seem the right type. Except Madeline, but I'm not sure I'll be able to sway her.
'''
Samras and Madeline are drifitng apart. Not really surprising, they're very different people. But this might give me my last chance with Madeline, though I really don't know how to handle it. It can't be public... Ritz is still about occasionally, and it would create problems with him. I don't even really know how to react.
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Sure enough, Madeline is feeling me out. I'm being supportive but not responding at all... whether she thinks I'm not getting her meaning or am ignoring her I don't know. She'll try harder though, she's a passionate person, and she won't let aloofness put her off for long. But it will show me how serious she is... and how much leverage I'll have.
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I'm not really sure what to say. Despite everything, Madeline chose Samras. I don't know why... but I confessed to her when she told me that. It was a foolish thing to do, but I've lost... I'm a hunted outlaw from Amnish 'justice' and the house of cards I was building to protect me has collapsed around me. She didn't kill me when I told her, though; she has such a kind heart.
'''
I met Madeline again today. Despite my confession to her she says she still loves me and wants me, because the face I've shown her, the kindness and consideration, are a part of me and cannot completely be faked. I didn't really know what to say.
But since everything else has fallen apart, I went to her. I don't know what I feel for her, or if this will last... but I'd rather be loved than be alone. She is a wonderful person, such kindness, courage and strength... there is plenty to admire in her, but will I grow to love her? I don't know. I don't know if I could love her as she loves me.
I guess we'll find out.
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I've made one decision, at least... now that Meiritin is closed to me forever, I can rid myself of the Betrayer. My children might wish his power, but since it wasn't sufficient to ensure my success, I think their lives will be made easier by its destruction. I've not been able to find a mage who knows how to use a truename yet, though.
'''
Success! One of Archmage Sway Sand's pupils is still in Light Keep, one Sonea. She had some of Sway's old notes on the subject, which I've borrowed... and Biad has translated them for me. I have the words of the ritual now, and know what I need now... silver dust for the pentagram and some other mages to help me contain the Betrayer.
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I'm free! But that was far too close. Bel'zan'der managed to snare me in the Abyss before we could do the ritual! Madeline and Biad got help from the Arcane Tower and managed to defeat him, while a party of Elves from Myon were travelling the Abyss and rescued me; their leader was King Trintiren himself, and Madeline and I made him a statue in thanks. It feels strange to no longer have the demon's taint, though its blood still retains enough power for me to cast some spells, and I no longer need to sacrifice it.
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Living with Madeline now as I try to find my bearings in this new life. It troubles me, though, to be so far from my children. Having set aside the tainted power of my heritage, and with it my ambitions, I grow more and more troubled that my life is still not as Yondalla would wish. I need to be with my children, to care for them... I want it, and I think the Mother wants it too.
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I've decided: I'm going to Jerum and Lilanca. I've booked passage on a free trader out of the Crow's Nest, and told nobody of my plans, not even Madeline... she would come with me, and while her company would be welcome on such a journey, I'm still not sure about how I feel about her, nor how Yondalla views our partnership. I will trust to Yondalla for guidance and protection, and hopefully return here with them soon.
Aramentia's Diary, Vol II
I came back to Cordor for a few days to trade, and what I found here made me change my plans and stay for a while longer. So I've started my diary again, to share my experiences with Lilanca, Jerum and Madeline.
Within moments of getting off the boat I saw signposts to the Earthkin Alliance headquarters. In Cordor. Then in the Merchant Quarter I bumped into Herial, who recognised me at once, and told me that Bendir had been taken over by a necromantic Queen. The second person I met was a fellow priestess of Yondalla, called Sasha. She is one of those behind the new Alliance building, and in talking further with her, she has recently converted from the service of Waukeen and is looking for guidance.
'''
Well, I've spoken with Sadamara, the new Queen of Bendir. I'm still not quite sure why she's not simply a mayor, but she doesn't seem to mind that I don't use her title. She does seem very focused and ruthless, with little to no compassion or care for others. Her husband is a tallkin priest of Cyric called Peter, and her chief spy is a tallkin called Katar Black. I understand now why everyone dislikes her and avoids Bendir. However, I can see her usefulness as a leader, if only those around her are there to balance her curiously focused personality. Her current advisors just won't do. Since my old home is up for sale, I have bought it to re-establish Yondalla's shrine.
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I've spoken more with Sasha and Feste, whom I remember from the old days. He apparently stood up and spoke against Sadamara at her coronation and is in her bad books. They mean the Alliance to teach our kin about their past here, and to provide them a safe home outside of Bendir. They told me more about the hin who still serve Sadamara: I do not think things are as bad as they seem to. Arlan - Aldur and Kikko's son - is her right hand, a priest of Hoar. He at least I should be able to talk to. Maar is a young boy and a powerful sorcerer, apparently kindly. Azrael and Dragrin are senior Hawk'ins, but are retiring to live together. Azrael I was always fond of, I'll try and talk to him.
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I have spoken with Azrael. He was instrumental in Sadamara's rise, but now regrets his part in it, along with much else that he has done this past decade. His despair touched me, and I sought to heal it, with some success I think. He and Dragrin should be happy in Guldorand, and I'm sure Az would help me if I asked him to. He still cares enough to warn me away from Bendir.
'''
I've passed the last few days writing histories and getting to know the current generation of Bendirites. Feste has made a statue of me for the Alliance building, which is very flattering... I was speechless when Sasha first showed me. As for Sasha herself, she seems in awe of me, which is a little unnerving. However, she still has a lot to learn - in particular that -all- hin are her responsibility.
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Arlan is planning to kill himself. Some Hoarite nonsense about punishing his dying wife for not telling him she was sick. I've tried various ways to change his mind... but while things looked bleak at first I think he's finally beginning to change his mind. He gave me the greatest compliment anyone ever has: he said that I was the only one whose words gave him cause to doubt his path.
The fort was attacked during one of our conversations... creatures I saw a long time ago, but which the Arcane Tower remembers are called Rippers. Katar Black apparently had some role in bringing them here, so Sadamara has now banished him. The attack was painful, but the removal of Katar is a major step forward.
'''
*this page is stained with tears* Arlan is dead - murdered. Azrael believes that a woman called Scorch did it, and that he made her pregnant shortly before. What a mess... Bendir's first murder, at least that I know of. I'm going to try and talk to Scorch...
'''
I did not manage to find Scorch. Nor did I hear any news of her. Either she was quietly killed, or fled... I suspect the latter. Either way, it seems we will get no better sign of her guilt or otherwise.
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The war of words, of ideals, between the Alliance and Bendir continues. Feste deplores the lack of integrity in Bendir's rule, while for her part Sadamara has intimated that she is willing to share power. I have spoken with Feste and Azrael, and I think that a compromise can be found here. If Sadamara will agree to a mayor with real authority, and Feste will accept that Sadamara is going to retain her crown, then the sides can be reconciled.
'''
Feste and Sadamara would both accept either Azrael or me as Mayor. Azrael is keen, and his betrothed Dragrin is proud that he might gain the position, I think. So do I step aside - again - and let another lead Bendir? My heart still wants it... even as a mayor under a Queen. I would need the support of Feste and Sasha, though. Sadamara has said that she will appoint whomsoever the Alliance unequivocally chooses. But I do not think I have enough supporters who are mine rather than Azrael's, so I think I will step aside this time, once more.
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I encountered Banites in the fort today! Three of them. First Knight Lady Slades, Templar Bloodsman and Squire Ken Winno. They also referred to Imperceptor Edwin Blackstone. I confronted them over Stonehold's history with Bendir, and not only were they proud of it, they gloried in the fact that Bendir had helped Ryan Valtheran claim his first stronghold from the minotaurs, before he turned on us. Sadamara's policy of neutrality towards them is plainly wrong, I am sure of that: they claim to be growing strong once more.
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Still angry over the Banites' defiance, I entered a mage fair tournament being run by miss Shaalira for the Harvest Festival. Throwing lots of tentacle spells around was good for my mood, though unsurprisingly I didn't win a round. Miss Melisandre won the event, defeating Archmage Mesmer in the final. Notable was her use of a possessed familiar and counterspells to win the summoning rounds. After the event Feste and I had a long chat. He's less and less comfortable with the compromise for Bendir's leadership the more detail we go into, and is going to talk to his friends about whether he should accept it or challenge Sadamara's rule instead. Yondalla's creed guides me toward the compromise as Sadamara is hin too, but so long as there is no violence I would gladly contest her rule. We'll see what course Feste decides on.
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Jerum has arrived, though Lilanca decided to delay her departure. Jeru's sure she'll join us though, she's probably just making a point. Still, Jeru has found friends already, so I'm sure he'll settle in just fine. For my part, I think I will maintain this diary; maybe it will be of interest to others when I no longer wish to keep it private.
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It has been a hectic few days, but I am Mayor-elect of Bendir and Sadamara has chosen to leave the island. Her departure makes my life easier, though her bitterness leaves a bad taste. Still, it is better than violence. Recently the forces of the Abyss, led by their 'Emperor', allied with Banites under First Knight Slades to try and break the Queen of the Abyss, Kathea, out of Spellhold. Bendir joined the Keep and Cordor in resisting them, and the attackers were captured.
Earlier that day I was confronted and threatened in my own home by Ferret, a hin monk and alchemist who Sasha knows. He wanted to kill me for knowing too much about him - such as the fact that he is a Lovietaran. I escaped with a lens, but he still wants to harm me. I will have to take care.
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The Banites gathered at the gates of Bendir, but our allies in the Keep and Myon arrived in force, and gave them formal notice that they are no longer welcome here. They have threatened war but that is as expected; better now when I am confident we can win than later when I may not be.
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Sasha is in pieces today. She accepted the offer of help from Sandrhir, a Red Wizard, to invade the mind of a hin called Hlaine who was accused of stealing from the Alliance. She asked the wrong question, though, and caused severe embarassment to
Aramentia's Diary, Vol III
*the writing continues mid-sentence* Hlaine. She is taking the mistake harder than she ought, though, and doubts herself all the more after inadvertantly setting Ferret on me. Still, she and I have big plans for a meeting of the leaders of the isle, and work on that distracts her from her doubts.
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Today, we saved Ferret, but not until after he'd attacked us at the gates. I sent him with Arlan - who knew him before - to Soulhaven in the hope that Arlan could talk some sense into him. Well, some time later, Arlan came to the shrine carrying Ferret's body... He told us that he had driven an evil spirit out of Ferret's body, but that the body was fading without it. Sasha, Arlan and I tried a few things, but none helped... until I turned to my blood magic. I had hoped never to draw on it again, but through it I was able to locate Ferret's true soul, trapped under Cordor by Black and the Sanctuary.
I sent Arlan to get Ferret's soul from Black and set myself to trying to keep Ferret's body in the land of the living. I was close to losing him when Arlan returned with Katar and a giant altar which bound Ferret's soul... or possibly that and other spirits. Destroying the altar in his presence returned some measure of Ferret's self to him. However, when Ferret came to himself after some rest and remembered what he had done, he fled, faster than any of us could follow him. I hope he finds his way back to us in time.
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Lily is here, but resists all attempts to see me. One of the friends she has found is Eden, a sweet girl with her own family problems. She and I are fast becoming friends, and she engineered a meeting between me and Lily. It did not go well. How can I have failed so badly as a mother to her? I cannot reach her.
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The days leading up to our planned meeting were unnaturally gloomy, a dense mist shrouding much of the isle, and undead everywhere. I will not write of the horrors that visited us, only pause to note the valour of Arlan, Maar and the others in keeping them from our gates.
After days of simply fighting to hold our line, we broke the shackles long enough to send a strikeforce to Minmir, where scouts reported the densest mass. Allies from Cordor and Light Keep fought there alongside our forces, and eventually won a great if costly victory. I will note more details as I find them out.
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